“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” – Lucille Ball
The most important relationship you’ll ever have in your life is the relationship you have with yourself. But if you’re anything like the majority of women, it’s also the one that you tend to neglect the most.
You forget to nourish your own soul and show yourself the kindness you deserve, and instead focus on external relationships instead like your friends, family and romantic partner.
And thanks to our unintentional neglect, our lives can’t ever be as shiny, happy and fulfilled as we really deserve.
So this Valentine’s Day, don’t just focus on showing your partner the love, but also make it your mission to start loving yourself a whole lot more too. Want reasons why? Here you go:
#1: You’ll become SO much happier
You can journal your socks off, meditate for hours and go live on a mountain top, but if you don’t learn to love yourself, you’ll never ever become a happy person. Really.
Sure- you might manage to find a glimpse of happiness without loving yourself completely. Great things might happen to you, you might have tons of adventures and you might feel like those dark clouds have parted for a while.
But if you haven’t learned to love yourself more, these moments of joy will be short-lived and you’ll soon find yourself feeling just as unfulfilled, angsty and generally ‘down’ as you did before. Self-love is the answer.
#2: You might find true love
It’s true what they say- you can’t love anyone else until you love yourself. Because if you’re not feeling the self love vibe it’s absolutely impossible to be your true authentic self.
By default, you’ll constantly be trying to conceal your flaws, desperate to only ever present your ‘best’ side, and generally become the person you think the other person wants in their life. Do you think this is either a) healthy b) happy or c) attractive. Of course not.
You need to be authentic, vulnerable whilst loving and valuing yourself if you want to attract genuine love. You might have if the self-help circles about the ‘Law of Attraction’-the idea that like attracts like, and in this case, it really is true.
The more you love, the more you actually attract love into your life.
And I don’t just mean the romantic kind- I’m talking warm and loving friendships, better relationships with your family and even that special furry kind from your pets.
#3: You’ll start taking better care of your body
Self love will help you look after your body in the way that it deserves.
You’ll easily eat the most nourishing foods, show up to give your body the exercise it craves and quit those unhealthy habits like yo-yo dieting, orthorexia, drinking heavily, smoking, doing drugs, self-harm, toxic relationships or whatever else you personally use to self-medicate.
You see, most of us have make one giant mistake when it comes to getting healthy… We get to a point where we feel sick of feeling fat, frumpy, tired and unfit.
So we go crazy and throw ourselves into some new celebrity-endorsed fad diet, drag ourselves to the gym day after day and push ourselves until we get perfect , ‘lose that disgusting weight’ or ‘find love and acceptance. We punish ourselves, deprive ourselves and then wonder why, despite all the blood sweat and tears, it all comes crashing around our ears.
When you come instead from a place of self-love, living a healthy lifestyle becomes blissfully easy.
#4: You’ll rediscover your inner goddess!
Ever wished you could find a fast-track to becoming some kind of modern Aphrodite and erase those stretch marks on your hips, banish cellulite forever and erase your chronic eczema to leave leave you looking fresh as a daisy, stunningly beautiful and simply divine?
Well, my friend. You absolutely can. Self-love is the answer!
Before you roll your eyes and scroll down the page, hear me out. Self-love really will stop you getting so hung up on what you perceive to be ‘flaws’ and start celebrating your wonderful strong, feminine, amazing body.
And I’m speaking from experience here- having a healthy strong baby, suffering for years with a skin condition and having my fair share of stress has marked my body.
My back is covered with HS scars. My abdomen is criss-crossed with stretchmarks from having a GIANT (beautiful) baby boy and I’ve got far too many forehead lines for a girl my age.
But you know what? None of this ultimately matters. I’ve learned to accept them because I’ve learned to love myself a whole lot more.
#5: You’ll start moving towards the life of your dreams!
And following on from that last point- when you love yourself more, you can finally start making all of your dreams become a reality.
Want to go live on a boat for a year? Sure- make it happen!
Want to quit your accounting job and retrain as a climbing instructor? Go ahead!
Want to give it all up and move to a bamboo hut on a steamy tropical island? AWESOME!
Self love gives you the fuel and the confidence to make the right decisions in your life and keep your best interests at heart.
You’ll realise what really matters to you and realise what doesn’t. You’ll discover what makes your heart sing and what drains your energy and you will use this all as fuel to become the best possible version of yourself. If that isn’t reason enough to work to boost your self love, I don’t know what is!
So this Valentine’s Day, I’d urge you to side-step the commercial, materialistic crap and instead turn inwards to examine how much self love you are really feeling inside.
Imagine your life with more self-love. Imagine your heart expanding with self love and becoming happier, more fulfilled and far less stressed. Wouldn’t it be even MORE awesome to be you? I’ll leave you to answer that…